Im losing faith and often get mad at allah, Is there anything I can do about it?

I don't know what part to share, I used to be a lot religious as a kid and fear Allah but after I've grown up i feel like my suffering just doesn't end, first it felt like a test now it feels like an eternal curse. Im almost near the death end and my suffering still doesn't seem to end, bad luck always gets to me, I feel like he(swt) hates me. I've been doubting a lot of things about islam too, I can't control myself. I'm physically and mentally ill, As if that wasn't enough, Im born in an environment where people like me are treated like curses and puppets. I just can't handle it anymore. My friend said im a closeted ex muslim because i doubt islam too much and I don't have a stable faith in it. Is it true?

submitted by /u/Batsumatsu
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