Hello, I'm posting this on a throwaway as my brother knows my socials
I’m living in a very difficult home environment in Southeast Asia (mind you, we are not natives to SEA). My mother is extremely controlling and uses religion as a justification for constant emotional and physical abuse. My father lives in another country and blindly supports her from afar, agreeing to punishments like cutting our internet during holidays without seeing the reality of what’s happening here.
The hardest part is my brother. Subhanallah, because of the abuse he’s suffered, all while being told it’s for the sake of religion and being a better person (which is a huge lie) he has completely turned away from Islam. He told me he doesn't believe anymore.
I understand where he is because I turned away from the Deen initially for the same reasons. The hypocrisy and the pain made me want to leave it all behind, but I eventually found my way back on my own terms. The last time he tried to be honest about his doubts, it ruined the family and put unimaginable stress on us. The response wasn't kindness; it was more abuse and I would rather put a gun in my mouth than live it again wallahi. Now, I’m the only one who knows the truth about how he feels.
I’m not going to force him to change or lecture him, as that was the thing that turned him away in the first place. I can see that his disbelief is a shield he’s using to protect himself from the pain my mother causes. My plan is to work hard, build a career, and eventually move to a stable environment where I can show my family the mercy and respect they never showed me.
How do I support a brother who is being driven away from his faith by the people who should be protecting him? How do I help him stay strong when the people in charge are making things so hard?
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