The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “I guarantee a house on the outskirts of Paradise, a house in the middle of Paradise, and a house in the highest part of Paradise for one who gives up arguing even if he is right.”
Source: al-Mu’jam al-Kabīr 217
Grade: Hasan li ghayrihi
Often times what I see on this subreddit and others is that people start out respectfully debating ideas but then soon it devolves into an ego-driven exchange. People keep on replying because they don't want the other to "have the last word." They think stopping replying means they've "lost the argument."
Often these internet arguments devolve into name calling "you're so dumb," or something. Often, I see on reddit arguments a reasonable person who's respectfully trying to explain ideas and the other person is being condescending, name calling, and not listening. I always remind the first person that giving up arguing is aligned with Islamic ethics.
Next time you are in an online debate with someone, make a mental checklist before you hit Reply each time. It is in Islamic ethics to constantly examine our niyyah (intention). Intentions can subtly change over the course of an argument.
Checklist before everytime you hit Reply:
- What percentage of my niyyah (intention) is a genuine attempt to provide guidance or exchange of ideas? What percentage of my niyyah is out of a fear of losing?
- Am I afraid that silence will look like defeat?
- Am I mocking, belittling, or using sarcasm? Is my language pleasing to Allah SWT?
- Would I be happy if I was proven wrong?
- Has the conversation become counterproductive? Is the other person mocking, insulting, or refusing to engage honestly?
Takeaway
As Muslims, we must fight our nafs to purify ourselves of arrogance. Sometimes, this can come in the form of arguing because you're afraid of looking like you lost. Even if you know you're right.
If you have made key points and the other person isn't listening, then walk away. You cannot force acceptance of an idea immediately but you can plant a seed. Readers can read both sides and judge for themselves.
