A desire to revert that has been continuous, I'd love some guidance on a few problems

Hello all!

I don't really know where to go with this post. I have an interest in Islam, that I've had for about 3 years now? Around that time amount. I have a good friend whose Muslim and they were helping me learn about it. But since i have a very predominant Christian family, I kept trying to push the "calling" away. Just to add, I'm in my mid twenties. So this isn't a juvenile flighty/temporary fixation for me lol.

Something about Islam just feels right for me. I've read a good portion of the Quran, and was delighted with how similar the stories were, to my own upbringing! But I'm nervous about a few main issues with myself.

• My Christian family. I really think it would cause some drama and strife. And I don't even think they're devout Christians. Unless it's a holiday, or a situation like this, I never hear much about their faith. Sort of just a "cultural norm" type of thing.

• I am decently plagued with mental illnesses and physical disabilities. I worry that I wouldn't be able to keep up with all the teachings and lifestyle. I'm also worried my mental health issues would be a source of strife. Just to be clear my mental issues are all minor/ not dangerous to myself or others. As in I have control of my actions.

• I do worry though since in the past, I've dealt with suicidal thoughts. Which I know is a huge sin in Islam.

• I'm just worried I won't be good enough in the eyes of Allah.

I know this is a jumbled mess, but im just voicing my thoughts. Hopefully someone here will have some wisdom for me.

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