Assalamu Alaikum. I'm a Hindu but I recently have been having thoughts of converting to Islam. It's not that important or anything but my YouTube algorithm is full of Quran recitations. I have downloaded a PDF of the Quran on my computer as well and am currently on the first chapter. I'm taking my time to read it and understand it. I'm trying to read it from an unbiased perspective so that it might help me understand it better. There are certain Surahs that I have listened to a lot by chance on YouTube, being Ayat Al Kursi, Al-Duba and Al-Qar'ia. I find them incredibly relaxing and I like to read or listen to the Quran before sleeping. It started all of a sudden when I came across some YouTube video talking about the beauty of Islam. Then my YouTube algorithm got flooded with similar videos, and I understand that's how the algorithm works. I feel a sense of peace when I am reading or listening to the Quran (still on first chapter), a sense that something or someone is watching over me and I feel a gentle presence. But at the same time I feel conflicted because if I were to convert to Islam then my parents and relative would look at me with scorn, tell me that I tainted the family line. My family thinks that Islam is what they see on the media with my dad saying it's the worst religion ever. I know it's not. I understand that some Muslims, and I don't mean all Muslims, I'm referring to rulers in history have taken some verses of the Quran out of context or misinterpreting it. That's an insight I got when reading the first few pages. I have done my research on Islam and trying to understand the five pillars, how prayer works, etc. It's a lot to take in. But the thing is, my dad forbid me to research Islam and he thinks Muhammad is a false prophet, a pedo, etc. I don't agree with that, but as I read the Quran I also try to understand the context of the time period those verses were revealed. I'm worried that if I convert, my parents might disown me and that I'd have to keep it secret. I also don't want to lie because I heard it was forbidden in Islam, I'm not sure whether that's true or not. I feel like my heart is being drawn to Allah and I feel conflicted about whether to convert or not. If I did hypothetically, I'd be disowned by my family because they associate Islam with the political issues regarding Islam in India, especially Kerala and they think I might end up as one of those young Hindu women forced to convert. I'm not sure where to begin and I feel uneasy as I'm feeling drawn to Allah.
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