I used to pray for someone to love and then he came. I asked Allah for signs and they all seemed in favor of Allah’s will. I learned to trust and believe him. I started loving him. He was the first Muslim man I dated as a muslim woman. He unknowingly brought me closer to my religion. I sometimes prayed just in gratitude. When there was a period of separation, my prayers for him led me to Tahajjud. I’d never known Tahajjud before that. I prayed to Allah if he’d reunite us I’d thank him. And I continued to after Allah granted me that wish. Through this man, I was introduced to praying when it rained, on Fridays, during travels, on Arafah. I learned more about dhikr. I embraced my Muslim identity. He didn’t ask me to do anything of this. I just felt Allah guided me somehow as I prayed for our relationship
Through him I came closer to Allah. Learned sabr and tawakkul.
And one day, he disappeared. I don’t know why . No explanation nothing. I have been trying to accept allahs will but each time I start praying I end up praying for him and us. I am always determined to not pray for him but I end up waking up for Tahajjud and praying for us.
I don’t know if he’s allahs will or not for me. I don’t know why I can’t stop praying for us. If he brought me peace and closer to allah then why did allah take him away from me?
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from Islam https://ift.tt/PWt3NB7
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