Growing up I was raised as an Atheist as both my parents didn’t believe in God, they were both very scientific (Dentist & GP) and had their own explanations for the universe and so on. I wasn’t bothered anyway but I did used to get depressed thinking what happens when we die then, is that it? Tried to keep myself happy with short term gains such as drugs, alcohol, hanging with the boys late night etc. Was never truly happy. One night when I was 17 I was out drunk messing around with mates and I got into a fight with a group of boys, I accidentally killed one of them with a pocket knife I used to carry. Got a 20 year sentence but reduced with conditions, my barrister was very good. Although I was extremely upset, I felt I deserved to go Jail and die there as well. Jail life was hard, I kept my head down, got a job in jail cleaning and just spent my days sleeping, watching TV and talking to others. My first cell mate was caucasian and didn’t give a hoot about anything. After some time he was released and I was joined by another cell mate who was Muslim. He wasn’t into Islam much but started bettering himself by praying and going to Islamic speeches held in the jail. I used to laugh at him and say ‘if thats how you want to pass your time then carry on’. After a few years I started getting mentally drained and I kept getting feelings in my mind pushing me to ask someone for help, I kept crying at night asking the guards to let me out of the cage, screaming. No one would help me. My cell mate said - ‘why don’t you ask a superior power?’ At first I thought thats bonkers, but one day in severe desperation in my mind I said ‘please God, help me!’ - I went to bed. The next morning I woke up and felt mentally sane, a feeling of patience, sadness left my chest a bit but not fully. So I told my mate and he said why dont you just give The Quran a try, if you dont find it interesting then stop reading. I thought okay im here for years to come I might as well read a book. So I started, as time went on me and my cell mate had debates on Islam and science, he used verses from The Quran to prove the scientific facts to me. I was amazed and thought wow..I didn’t take my shahada then, I was still in two minds because I thought my parents already hate me that im in jail, now they’ll hate me even more because Ive changed my belief. So I just kept researching more and more, one thing that kept pulling my heart in was ‘God is all forgiving as long as you repent’ - I begged for forgiveness literally 24/7 everyday in that cell. After a long time I was released and I went home and told my parents about my new beliefs, their first response when they saw me was ‘were there no razors and in jail’ - I laughed and said i chose not to shave and keep a beard because its sunnah! Immediately their attitudes changed and told me im too old to live there, and to get a council house, which I did. They disowned me. I took my shahada on the 1st September 2022, new name, new life. I carried on, 2 months later, both my parents have reverted to Islam! Subhan’Allah. After 2 months of debating CONSTANTLY, and showing proof in the verses, I made both my atheist parents Muslim! Im still living in a council house as of yet but ive been asked to move home, however its time for me to start working and get a house to live in on rent. Thats my story, pray for my forgiveness and make dua for us all.
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