Temptation of women is too burdening mentally on a day-to-day basis for me. It’s like walking on a treadmill at all times. You think it’s nothing initially, just something in the background, but after a while it starts to tire you out. Or dealing with gusts of wind outside and trying to maintain balance everyday. It’s also testing my self-worth on the daily now with loneliness.

It manifests as extreme depression now. I don’t have the coping mechanisms to fight it. If you told me right to fight it - sure, I’ll lower gaze and not sin - but it turns into depression that I can’t fight. I can’t fight it guys. Tell me to fight in the gym, I’ll pump iron for you - but this depression from temptation, I can’t fight. Always gotta be home to feel better. Sometimes it makes my head want to explode.

This didn’t need its own thread, and it’s a pretty weird confession, but I threw it here because I’m weird like that. What a disease inflicted on us.

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