Salam everyone,
Just to add some context to the situation, I’m a young woman (22) who lives out at university right now. I feel like my iman is currently so bad and I’m honestly facing a crisis of identity. I smoke, talk to guys and don’t dress modestly. Recently I’ve had extremely strong urges to commit zina (more than usual) and I don’t know what to do. Whenever I’m on social media all I see is sex, when I watch tiktok EVERYTHING is based on it and it’s making it really hard to stay away from it/control my urges.
I have a guy friend (he’s not Muslim, atheist) and whenever we chill together he’ll make small remarks about sex and I feel like he’s really testing me. He knows I’m a virgin and he argues with me saying that I shouldn’t wait til marriage because I need to give myself the chance to experiment. He’s good looking and I’m honestly scared because I’m sexually attracted to him and I know he is to me with the passing comments he makes.
My parents won’t let me marry because I still need to finish my degree and find work etc, but I feel like I’m losing myself more and more everyday and they don’t think women have urges like men do. I hate this society so much and what I have turned into. I never used to be like this. I don’t know what to do anymore, or where to begin, but I want to save myself from potentially making the biggest mistake of my life.
Edit: throwaway account, and also sorry if I offended anyone with this. May Allah forgive me if it caused you offence but I just need religious advice rn.
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