If you guys just glance at my post history you'll know what a hot mess my family life is but in the interest of keeping it short, I need advice.
My parents have neglected my siblings and I growing up and now are making us feel guilty for not wanting to spend time with them. This is how we were conditioned ever since we were young. Whenever we went to spend time with my mom she would kick us out and lock herself in her room because she wanted alone time. And my dad never asked about us and never really came to have a conversation with us. We always had to be the ones to reach out and talk. It's been almost 3 decades like this for me and my siblings but now they want to be "affectionate" (it'sin quotation marks because it'snot affection). I just can't do it and they make me feel so guilty for "not repaying their debt" when the reality is that they didn't sow that affection in us to reap it now. I never felt love towards them, just a sense of obligation. And they always come for me to make me feel guilty and not my siblings. I just can't force myself to spend time with my mother and I can't force myself to call or message my dad and ask how he is. He's never even picked up the phone to ask about me yet gets angry that I don't ask about him. Why do they only take and never give? Am I wrong for wanting time to myself? I know this is avoidant behaviour but they're really toxic and I learned to value my mental health. What should I do?
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