Salam Aleykum Brothers and Sisters,
I am from a sunni turkish family yet my parents never forced me to get into religion and even if I fasted and didn't commit sins I never did it with a purpose toward Allah but just to appease the others. My grandmother passed today and I want to get into religion to calm myself reassuring that she's in a better place yet I feel that will be hard as for 20 years I never really spoke to Allah and doubt in his existence is still very present in me even if I want to believe with all my heart. I plan on starting reading the Quran soon and to do it for my grandma since she was a true believer and I owe it to her but the thing is my heart wants to become a devout muslim but my brain keeps telling me religion is all lies and life is pointless. Any suggestions from your own experiences?
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