I grew up in a Muslim family but I do not consider myself Muslim. While I do not agree with Islam epistemologically, I do recognize its value as a philosophical guide to a good way of life, and I'm here seeking guidance from the community.
I am 38 years old and the eldest of 5, four male and one female. My parents are still well and healthy and hopefully have many years left in them, but they are getting up there in age.
This question is about one of my younger brothers, let's call him Arman. He's 33 years old, and is facing issues, and frankly I'm not sure where to draw the line as far as helping him. This story dates back to 2017 when he was 30.
I've never touched any drugs, but Arman and another brother of mine have tried a bunch of things, from mild to hardcore. In 2017, Arman took a cocktail of too many drugs and had a full on psychotic episode. He completely lost his mind and ended up in a psychiatric hospital where they kept him for 2 weeks. Everybody in the family visited him almost daily and by the time he left the hospital he was back to normal. Not 1 week later, he was back in the hospital after another psychotic break, this time not drug induced (as far as we know). He was diagnosed with Schizophrenia and given medication.
Over the past 3 years, whenever he's on his medication, he's perfectly fine. However, he doesn't like some of the side effects and for that reason has decided to stop taking the medication several times, each time landing himself in a new mental episode.
I can sense this post starting to get long so I'll cut to the chase:
- Arman is mentally ill and needs to take his medication, but refuses
- He is still taking drugs after all this time because he says he actually enjoys the psychotic episodes (at least the parts he remembers)
- He refuses to see his psychiatrist, refuses to see a psychologist, and refuses to go to rehab, even though my family is willing to pay large amounts of money to help him get well
- He hasn't earned any money for 3 years and rotates between living with me and other siblings
He's my brother and I love him with all my heart, but I don't know what else I can do. I keep going back to this conclusion - it's his life and he can live it however he wants, but I won't be there to save him yet again if he doesn't want to take steps and actions to get better. It breaks my heart to think this, and in reality I've never actually implemented this solution - I always break and end up helping him. However I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel and I'm really divided about actually taking a stance and not helping him in any way (unless he genuinely decides he wants to change).
What is the right thing to do? This is taking a massive toll (emotional, psychological, and financial) on everyone in my family.
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