Is it haram to leave?

Assalamu alaikum everyone,

I’m not certain if this is the proper place to post this. If it’s not, please kindly let me know so I can delete this off the page. I’m very desperate for any opinions or advice I can get on this matter.

I live with a psychologically abusive father (no longer that physically abusive due to me getting older and not feeling pain anymore.) I haven’t been able to connect with him emotionally, although I’ve been trying to for years. I know he loves me, but he’s not rational nor logical, and doesn’t show any affection unless he’d like attention. He gambles, drinks, has caused my mother to go into debt, and swears like a sailor. I’ve been emotionally distressed for several years, but tonight he’s drunk again, and I’ve realized that my mother and I can’t do it anymore. Our lives are all spiraling downwards, and he’s unfortunately the main reason for it.

I have sugarcoated his actions for the sake of my love for him btw. Moving on. We have given him so many chances to fix his bad habits. We forgive him on the VERY rare occasion that he apologizes. We try to be understanding. He has no family in the states, so we’d feel bad if we do end up leaving him. We know that if we leave him, he’ll act unbothered in front of us, but he will surely secretly spiral out of control and into a deeper depression.

I’m not a devout Muslim. I’m figuring my spirituality out because there are beautiful things in both Islam and Catholicism, which is why I’m learning more about both, but I do want to be a good child in the eyes of Allah regardless. I also want to fix my life, and my mother’s life, but because he isn’t on the same page as us, I don’t see an option besides leaving him behind. By leaving him behind, I simply mean leaving home with my mom and starting a new life somewhere, but still keeping in touch with my father. However, keep in mind, he’s very sensitive and has no family, and moving out would be so very offensive and hurtful for him.

I don’t want to hurt my father. After all, he is my father. I just don’t see where to go from here anymore. Would leaving him be haram, as it may cause him pain?

submitted by /u/indiffman
[link] [comments]

from Islam https://ift.tt/2GlfCNU