Determined to memorize the Qur'an but too scared to become a hafiz

ASA,

For a while I've gotten into the habit of memorizing Quran during my free time even at school every single day, and as I'm about to attend college next year, I (inshallah) intend on attending a part time hifz program.

But then two problems arise. My entire life, I've only memorized/recited the quran following normal Arabic rules but without tajweed. Soooo until I begin attending a hifz class, should I still bother continuing to memorize, or should I just wait until then?

Secondly, although I enjoy memorizing Quran, I'm an extremely shy person and can't imagine reciting quran in front of other people. I've only led a salah with my dad ONCE in my entire life, and I was so nervous I began forgetting and making mistakes. I understand it's the responsibility of the Hafiz to lead prayer, but I'm so terrified at the idea of leading other people I can't imagine how I'm supposed to manage later on. How am I supposed to address this anxiety, then?

submitted by /u/Zukotsu
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