This is going to be a long but question packed post, and really appreciate any input. I'm a 22 yr old male American. I grew up Christian but never really "believed" when I was 18 I considered myself an atheist due to no evidence. Or so I thought. At 20 I became a Muslim, but I fell off, or loss interest. It's not that I didn't like Islam it's that I really don't think I actually believed. Then at 21 I became Muslim again but the same thing happened again. I'm 22 now and I bounce between researching multiple religions, mainly Islam & Christianity. A few things in the Bible like how it says the earth sits on pillars or that the moon is its own light, that's an extreme contradiction that to me disproves the Bible immediately. The reason I became a Muslim in the first place is because I couldn't find any contradictions. But again, I don't think I actually believed both times. But the thing now is, is I've been noticing a trend with atheist, even myself sometimes & it's that atheist tend to gravitate towards satanic culture. Not "praising Satan" but seems like some like evil unknowingly. Sort of. Not all, but especially the hardcore atheist. It's sort of like atheist hate authority. I guess maybe I'm agnostic, but today I watched peace TV & he mentioned that evolution is not proven. And it's not. We have no proof for that. None. I'm at a place right now where I literally cannot decide on what I believe. I kind of feel this natural feeling of having a higher power but yet I was exposed to science, and according to it we have more evidence of other things happening, but yet even those can't be proven. Yea we know the big bang happened, but we don't know what caused it. There are so many thousands of religions, each have a little truth, each have miracles (allegedly) each person knows it's true, but I guess I expect to find a 1+1=2 proof but I'm not sure if that's possible or not. I don't know what I'm asking for in this post, but any words that can help lead me to truth would be much appreciated. I do know one thing, when I considered myself Muslim it felt natural. But again, I don't want to become Muslim again if I truly don't believe it. If I do, I want to be fully committed and really believe it. Thanks, and if God is real, inshallah I find the truth.
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