Salam,
I have a question. I know plastic surgery is generally considered haram, but I can't stand to look like...me, anymore. My nose is very horribly big. Stereotypical "jew" nose (and I am ethnically jewish), legitimately witch-like, points downward when I smile and has a huge bump. People comment on it a lot. I can't stand to be in pictures. I just got my university school photo back and I am in tears at how awful it is. Very crooked, casting a shadow across my cheek. I never want to get married because I am embarrassed about my face and could never be comfortable with them.
My appearance has destroyed my self esteem so badly that I spent years compensating with anorexia so at least I would have a "model" body, even if my face is ugly. I starved myself from age 13 onward, so badly that I stunted my growth, and can still fit into children's clothes. I've honestly wanted to end my own life. I can't stand myself. I'm so embarrassing to look at. I considered wearing niqab to hide my face but you can still see how large my nose is and how flat the rest of my face is through the fabric.
Is there some way I could get a minor surgery to straighten my nose without it being haram? I don't want a surgery for any vain reason. It hurts me to look in the mirror. All I want is to fix my nose so it's less deformed. That's all. I'm desperate.
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