I never really struggled with obsessiveness until a few months ago. Then it hit like a tidal wave and within a few months, I've been diagnosed with OCD and everything has just gotten overwhelming.
The effect this has had on me has been devastating. I never feel like my clothes are pure, no matter what I do. If I put them in the laundry machine, perhaps the soap and the dryer sheets are not pure or there is residue of najasah from other people. People in my apartment have a dog and I even know for a fact that things with dog-related impurities have been put in before. If I handwash my clothes, then while in the process of washing and drying, they touch impurities somewhere etc. I buy new clothes all the time to avoid this but even then I am tortured with doubts, what if they are coated with something impure before being shipped etc? It has gotten ridiculous and is really ruining my life. I'm so stressed because I start law school in just two days Insha Allah, I need to focus on school but instead all day long I'm thinking about clothes. If anybody could tell me a way to just ensure clothes are pure once and for all, please let me know as I honestly don't know what to do. I'm so sad and guilty because I've never missed prayers before. No matter what other sins I was committing, Allah forgive me, the prayer was the one thing I'd never abandon. But since these issues started, my prayers have gotten worse since I'm always running out of time between them trying to get my clothes clean in long winded ways.
I am getting professional help for this. I know I've written about this before here in the past so sorry. I'm just getting absolutely desperate and the one thing I absolutely cannot move past is this clothes idea. If anyone has any suggestions or insight I would be so grateful as this has just become absolutely devastating. Jazakhallah khair.
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