I know there are a couple posts about Ummah Forum, but I just rediscovered it after being inactive for a couple years. For some background, while my family is Muslim by name, they do not practice at all and actively encourage me to sin and mock the deen. At 16, when I decided to learn about the deen, I turned to the internet (it's hard getting to the mosque here and I was too shy to ask my questions in person). I thought Ummah Forum was the best Islamic forum out there, because I thought everyone had strict adherence to the Quran and Sunnah. After about a year on there, I started having emotional breakdowns because I was being told I should support terrorist groups, I should hate all non-Muslims, that I was a kaffir for having doubts about the deen, that I would burn in Hell for not wanting to grow a beard (at 16), that I should destroy my family's alcohol--otherwise I'd be condoning and enabling their sins--, I was told men had the right to beat their wives until they were blue for not serving them, I was told if I didn't agree with suicide bombings I was no better than the Western forces who invade the Middle East (and that I was a bad Muslim and potentially a kaffir for it). I was even told that as soon as I turned 18 I should emigrate to a Muslim country otherwise I'd be considered from among the kuffar on Judgement Day.
To say the least, it was a pretty traumatic experience that literally made me hate life and everything about living. After i detoxed from it for a bit, I felt a lot better about the deen--although if you see my post history you'll know I still have major doubts :(
I was looking for an answer to my question today and Ummah popped up as the first result, and all the panic came back. While you may agree with wala and baraa, it was probably the most traumatic teaching for me, because I was basically told to disown and be aggressive toward anyone I knew who wasn't a Muslim, including some members of my own family and friends. That and that I should be celebrating suicide bombings.
Yeesh, I thought I was over it all but I guess I'm not.
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